cactusy | IC contact for lastvoyages

Will grins briefly and shakes his head, looking back up into Shaw's eyes. "No, with you, I have to actually actively look. So I don't have to do my normal routine."

He looks back up, licking his lips, as he starts thinking about his techniques. Some of them have been with him for so long that he doesn't entirely remember where he picked them up. One is new and effective, but he'll be avoiding talking about that one for the time being.

"So if I find attachments forming, or I think I'm having feelings that aren't my own, I immediately detach myself from the situation, and throw any barriers in between us on the way that I can. Glasses go on, I close off my body language, I find something to stare at that I can focus on. If I can't remove myself, I'll do a slow count in my mind, timing with my breaths. Up to 10, then start over. Usually that's enough to stop anything happening in the moment."

He scratches his chin. "If it continues past that point, then I'm going to get away. Remove myself from the situation, find a small room to hide in with the lights off, pet whatever animals I'm near. Change all sensory experiences. Let myself reset."

Considering the vast gulf of difference between both their personalities and their situations, it's interesting how similar his coping mechanisms are to some of Shaw's, and her eyebrows jump just slightly in response.

"I can keep an eye out for that happening. Sounds like you're pretty good at pulling yourself back, but. I'll lend a hand, if I need to. You got a go-to small room? Your cabin?"

No pressure, hm?

I'll do my best.

So you probably already saw the exchange, but just in case you didn't- I've taken up John Gaius on his healing offer. I can get hurt, but I should bounce back immediately.

So the next flood like that, or- whatever that was, should give you at least one less headache.

It was Henry off his leash; we can call it what it is.

You know the point is to help you too, right? Not just make things easier for me.

Yeah, but what put him off the leash was some strange combination of going back home and coming back wrong, which apparently can happen to us dead people.

I know. And I'm sure it'll help in the future. But the main reason I accepted it was that I don't want other people to worry. Now that I apparently have People.

It's weird, isn't it.

[The Barge isn't her first experience with Having People, but she remembers all too well when having her team was new and strange. It's still strange, honestly.]

[ He laughs in disbelief. ]

It's really weird.

I was used to, you know, family. Classes in school. Military units. A partner. The team still felt different. And here-- I don't know what here feels like.

I'm glad you're gonna be okay.

I didn't really have any of that. I had a father who didn't know what to do with me, and was probably relieved when I went off to the academy. So I don't really have anything to compare it to...nothing healthy, anyway.

But yeah, between you and Harkin and Malcolm, I figured it was worth the risk. And if Iris trusts this guy enough to give him back his powers, that risk is probably low.

Is Iris gonna become one of your people, too? Just trying to figure out how big of a headache I need to prepare for.

I believe Iris has already claimed me as one of her people. Althought that could just be the impression I've gotten with her telepathy.

[ He sounds pretty sure, though. And fond of her. ]

So it's probably too late. I give the headaches, even as I take them away.

You can tell her to go screw herself. She thinks she's claimed me too, but she's wrong.

Guessing you don't want, though.

I don't.

Do you know how unusual it is, that there's someone who can understand me like I understand the rest of humanity? I don't have to- to translate what I see, how I understand things. I can just hand it over, and she revels in it.

She thinks of me like a puzzle. I'm mostly just hoping she doesn't get bored when she works it out.

If she does, want me to kick her ass for you?

No. I feel like she's going to work through everything to find I'm not much more complicated than Hannibal. Or that-

[ That she'll think that, anyway. He catches himself and blows out a heavy breath. ]

I think I'm looking for the ways this all might fall apart. I've been having too good a time here. Like I said...having people genuinely interested in my wellbeing feels strange. Almost uncomfortable, really.

Pretty sure this place encourages it.

[She says, dryly.]

The breaches, the sharing floods - the Admiral has a clear goal here.

[It suuuuuuuuuucks.]

I do know what it feels like, to feel understood and appreciated like that. I know I give her shit, but I'm glad she can do that for you.

[ Will hums in agreement with her assessment of the breaches and floods. At least some of it is probably in service to getting all these outcasts to bond.

He pauses for a long moment after the rest of her comment. ]

I'm glad, too. Honestly, she's so...pure in her intentions, I almost don't know how to approach it. She gives me such a dog feel that I didn't expect her to have a human form when I first met her.

I met her as a dog first, too; I liked her better that way.

There's positives to both sides, I think.

[ But he knows how Shaw is with his dogs, and he grins. ]

That reminds me- it's been over a month now. Think you could try requesting another of my dogs?

Yeah, okay. Which one?

I'm tempted to say Buster, but it should probably be Jack. He's a German Shepherd mix, active but fairly calm. Him, Jet, and Winston make a good base for the rest of the pack.

You have good taste in dogs, Graham. I'll let you know what the Admiral says.

You doing okay?

Thank you.

And yeah, I'm feeling a lot more settled than I was a few days ago. [ He also finally got some sleep. ] How's the death toll coming along? You doing okay?

If I say yes and the answer is no, can you tell?

[Because guess what!]

IC contact for lastvoyages

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