cactusy | IC contact for lastvoyages

Yeah. [ A quiet, self-deprecating chuckle. ] I really... thought She was talking to me. And it felt good to be looking for Greer and Martine.

[ It's bad enough to dream about it, but to have it appear to be real when she's awake? Not cool. ]

How's your wound?

Fine.

[She starts to lift her hand to touch it, then forces herself not to, balling her hand into a loose fist instead.]

I should change the bandages today; you wanna help with that?

[ All Root wants to do is hold that fist in both her hands. It's almost enough to tear through the exhaustion of being imprisoned after all that chaos. ]

Absolutely. I'll be your personal nurse. Then after, we can have some soup and relax on the couch for a while.

[Shaw's instincts tell her that she should get her bandages changed, and then get back to work immediately. She's spent the past six days being useless, three of them during an active crisis; how can she just rest when there's so much to do?

But then, there really isn't anything to do right now, is there? That's the paradox of the Barge, at least to her mind. She's always on duty, never between jobs, doesn't really have any downtime. But the number of active tasks and concrete things to accomplish? Criminally low.

But Root's here, and she looks exhausted. She probably needs to relax on the couch. And that's a concrete task, too.]

Take a nap with you?

I'd really like that.

[ Now her smile is more relaxed. It's like Shaw said the magic words to let relief start to creep through Root's veins. ]

We deserve it, after the week we've had. I'm sure Bear and Jet miss us.

Who took care of them?

[Jedao lets himself in quietly. He looks harried and tired, but in roughly one piece.]

[Shaw also does not look like she'd taken his suggestion that she rest to heart, but whatever Root's response to her question is, she'll give Jedao a quick nod during it.]

They're safe and sound in the kennels, I'm told.

[ She smiles at Jedao. Hello, friend! ]

[And after only a moment's more of hesitation, Shaw sticks her item through the bars to unlock the door, pushes it open, and steps out - making sure to keep a few feet of distance between her and Root as she does so.]

[Jedao closes his eyes, carefully scanning over Shaw's body for anything that shouldn't be there. It's just a little bit disappointing that he can't crush the chip's circuitry from the outside.]

You've got some gnarly scarring, but no chip. You're clear.

[Shaw closes her eyes, lets a little bit of tension leak out of her shoulders, and gives him a small nod.]

Thank you.

[It's very easy to mistake Shaw as the half of the Root-Shaw duo that eschews PDA; that wears a carefully-curated public mask that would risk being jostled by genuine, non-performative affection. But it's for the benefit of Root's boundaries that Shaw is careful in how she reaches out to her here: she steps forward to take her hand, giving it a squeeze, but stops short of initiating the hug that Root looks like she needs.]

You look like crap.

[She tells Jedao.]

The next time I ask you to do something that's probably unnecessary for anything but my own stupid peace of mind, you can tell me to buzz off if you want.

If I want to tell you that, I will.

[So there.]

[ Root, meanwhile, is careful not to push too hard with Shaw now. Like a child who's tired herself out too much to be angry anymore, she doesn't do more at the moment than squeeze Shaw's hand back. ]

Thanks, Jedao. [ Then, to Shaw-- ] Let's get your bandages changed.

Yeah.

[She starts to lift her free hand to rub at the back of her ear again, then stops, forcing it back down.]

Yeah, okay; sounds like a plan.

[ Giving Jedao a quick smile as a goodbye, Root tugs on Shaw's hand and starts heading to the nearest elevator. ]

This kind of thing happens a lot, doesn't it. Nobody seemed surprised to know what caused it.

I guess.

[She shrugs jerkily, giving Root's hand another squeeze.]

I listened to what Kiryu said. Didn't listen to the reactions.

It was mostly sarcasm and checking in to make sure people were okay.

[ Up they go. Finally. Out of Zero, after what felt like forever. ]

And I thought life back home was dangerous.

Back home, people stay dead.

[Which is a pretty major thing, Root!]

You're right. That's better here.

[ Because if Martine and Greer do show up, Root can kill them over and over.

But enough about those two. These two make it back to their cabin, and when the door is closed behind them, Root hugs Shaw, her shoulders all but deflating with the sigh she exhales over Shaw's shoulder. ]

You're okay.

[Shaw murmurs quietly: tucking her face against Root's shoulder, her bandage scraping against Root's cheek.]

We're okay. I'm-- okay.

That was terrible. [ said in a shaky whisper. ] I can't wait til we can go back home.

[ Together. Alive.

She holds on a little longer before pulling away and merting Shaw's gaze. ]

You don't have to be okay. You just have to be you.

[ Last week's chaos might be the closest Root will ever get to experiencing a fraction of what Shaw goes through every day. Questioning reality, believing things are a way they aren't, never feeling safe-- it's so much, and there's still little she can do to help. ]

It's my job to be okay. And if that really was just all in my head, if I really did just lose it and I never was an active danger - then I failed.

[She sounds matter-of-fact, not self-pitying, but she also sounds completely serious.]

It's impossible to always be okay, and none of this was your fault. There was a cursed sword on the ship, Sameen. I didn't even know that could be real.

[ She strokes Shaw's cheek with the backs of her fingers. ]

Doesn't matter whether or not it was my fault. It's still my responsibility to have my shit together.

[Shaw digs her chin against Root's chest, inhaling. ]

Couch?

[Couch please. ]

IC contact for lastvoyages

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