IC contact for lastvoyages

[cactusy]

[If I don't have an active post up, feel free to use this post to have your character call, videochat, text, or knock on Shaw's door.]

Comments

[themostfun]

[ The ISA does ring a bell. Facts from the future start to align and make clearer sense. ]

Did you find who killed him?

[cactusy]

They were just government mooks following orders, so I did one better: I found the guy who let the kill happen.

[themostfun]

Did you kill him?

[ her priorities are fine ]

[cactusy]

Yeah, I did. Don't regret it, either.

[themostfun]

Good. Nobody should get away with killing people who don't deserve it.

[cactusy]

Yeah. And he really didn't. Didn't deserve to be seen as the traitor they tried to make him out to be, either. He was-- moral. Brilliant, honorable, the kind of person who really thought about things.

[Carefully, Shaw nudges Samantha's knee with her own.]

You wanna talk about Hanna?

[themostfun]

[ She may as well. Fair's fair. Whatever reasons she has in the future for not talking about Hanna... they get married. It's kind of weird not to tell your spouse about something so important.

Samantha looks at Jet as she talks. ]

She was so nice. She was older than me, so because my mom was sick, Hanna watched out for me. She loved reading. She was really bad at Oregon Trail. [ There's a flicker of a smile at that memory. ] Everybody liked her. I don't understand why he did it. I don't want to understand.

[cactusy]

I know exactly why Cole was killed. Knowing doesn't always help so much in the end.

[Shaw pauses, then starts to lift her hand. Hesitates. Almost puts it back down again.

In the end, she rests it on Samantha's arm instead.]

[themostfun]

[ Once again, it's Shaw offering her sympathy like no one else did, only this time, she knows what Samantha did, and she believes what Samantha said she saw.

Sam's throat feels tight. Her eyes start to burn. She forces herself to focus on the dogs, their fur and warmth and characteristic scent. ]

Does it ever stop hurting? It's not like we can bring them back.

[cactusy]

I still think about him. I still miss him. It's still... like a dull thudding in me, sometimes. I think about how he would've loved working for Finch and doing the job I do at home, and I get mad that I was given that opportunity and he wasn't. But I can't change that. I can just. Remember him. Honor him or whatever.

[Shaw lifts her hand from Sam's arm to roll up her sleeve, showing her the tattooed words INDIGO FIVE BETA written across the inside of her left forearm.]

I get it redone every time I die.

[themostfun]

[ Sam can relate. Hanna's absence aches, even if the pain doesn't hit as often as it did at first.

Even knowing death here doesn't stick, the thought of losing someone else who's important to her feels like getting the air knocked out of her lungs. ]

Don't die. Not for good. If you have to die, only do it here.

[ Don't leave here by herself again. ]

[cactusy]

Back at you.

[Shaw sighs out, closing her eyes for a moment.]

I'll do my best.

[themostfun]

I know I die-- that's how I end up here. But I'll do my best not to die again when we leave here.

[cactusy]

Good; get yourself another ten, twenty years of life. The first time sucked enough.

[Is it sad that ten or twenty years seems like a generous ask when talking about a 37-year-old? Probably. She sighs again. Nudges Sam's ankle again.]

You want a hug or something?

[themostfun]

[ Given the life she ends up leading, making it to 50 sounds like an achievement, especially given she does die at 37. ]

Uh-- I guess so. Sure.

[cactusy]

[Shaw scoots up onto the bottom rung of the ladder, tossing an arm around Sam's shoulders. Hi. This is a hug.]

[themostfun]

[ It's a good hug. It leaves her space to wriggle out if she needs to, and is the first hug she's been given in... years. Sam leans against Shaw, head on her shoulder, absently stroking the dogs' fur. ]

[cactusy]

You know, I never knew what to do with hugs when I was a kid.

[Shaw says, rubbing her thumb over Jet's fur with her free hand.]

By the time I was your age I'd figured it out, but when I was really little? I didn't hate it, but I didn't get it.

[themostfun]

[ Sam gives the softest chuckle. ]

It's nice.

[ And so is Shaw, really. Smart, competent, badass. Good to know things get better. ]

See? You're not bad at people.

[cactusy]

[Shaw snorts quietly.]

Practice makes perfect, I guess.

[Not that she'll ever be anything close to that.]

[themostfun]

It helps that you're not faking it.

[ No wonder they end up married. Who better to trust than someone like Shaw? If she does something for you, it means she cares. ]

I'm glad we find each other.

[cactusy]

Me, too. I get pretty lucky.

[She gives Jet's ear a soft squeeze, and he wiggles around first to lick her hand, and then to nose against Samantha's.]

We get lucky with these guys, too; I'm glad we stole them.

[themostfun]

[ Jet gets some under the chin scritches for that. ]

They're really good boys.

[ She hopes they understand that. They're very, very good boys. Life would be easier back home if she had a dog, maybe. She's be less lonely. ]

I'm gonna sleep in my cabin, though.

[ Chronic introvert problems. ]

[cactusy]

Little me's gonna be happy about that; she kind of wanted the top bunk.

[themostfun]

Merry Christmas?