IC contact for lastvoyages

[cactusy]

[If I don't have an active post up, feel free to use this post to have your character call, videochat, text, or knock on Shaw's door.]

Comments

[ukan]

Yeah pretty much.

I wish Jean was around for you two. She's who my husband and I saw for therapy.

[cactusy]

don't suppose she was an actual therapist?

[ukan]

Yeah, PhD and everything. She was also telepathic. There were no miscommunications with her.

[cactusy]

telepathy, huh.

[Shaw isn't quite sure what she thinks about that, but quickly decides that since Jean isn't here and therefore isn't an option, it's not worth puzzling out.]

listen. off the record.

[She doesn't believe for a moment that this won't all get reported back to Malcolm regardless of what she says, but by god she can try.]

i know you're trying to help your friend. or packmate. or whatever. and i know how Malcolm thinks. i'm guessing he's assuming i picked Jedao because we're secretly best friends and we've worked out a deal for him to go easy on me.

but one of the top reasons i picked him is that i've talked through stuff with him before, and he doesn't go easy on me. i once asked him for advice on what i should do about Malcolm getting in the way of me working with Will. he told me i should let it go and get over it. i still don't totally agree, but he laid out his perspective, and it kind of made sense. he could have just given me vague sympathetic platitudes and kept his real thoughts to himself, but he didn't. i don't think he'll let Malcolm get away with things he'd rather be allowed to get away with, but i don't think he'll let me get away with anything, either. and that's what i want out of this.

[ukan]

Actually Malcolm thinks Jedao will try to be fair. He didn't mention anything about Jedao even knowing you before all this. His concern is that Jedao misinterprets a lot of what Malcolm says and does, and that's a valid concern to have about a mediator.

[cactusy]

it's a valid concern to have about an advocate. but if someone who's helping you learn to express yourself better misinterprets you, it gives you a concrete example of what you need to work on. Kiryu misunderstood both of us sometimes. we worked through it. that's what this whole thing is about, Lark.

[ukan]

It can, and often does, lead to taking sides, Shaw.

[cactusy]

it didn't with him. he was fair. i think Jedao will be too, and it sounds like Malcolm agrees.

[ukan]

I hope so.

[cactusy]

like i said. i get that you want to help your friend. and this is the friendship redemption Barge where everyone thinks everyone can be solved with friendship, all the time.

but sometimes, we need something else.

[ukan]

You really don't get that I want to help you too, do you?

[cactusy]

i think you'd consider that a nice bonus, but i know i'm not your priority. and i don't need to be.

[ukan]

Will Graham is my priority. That means making sure you're looked after, too.

[cactusy]

fair enough

which means i understand your reasons but this is still a really bad idea

2/2

[cactusy]

wait no

it's not actually a bad idea, it's just an idea with different goals and a different end result.

there are times when i've had people speak for me because i knew i'd suck at doing it myself

i'm not opposed to it under all circumstances

but it wasn't what we were doing with Kiryu. remembering what Kiryu was trying to teach me stopped me from calling your idea bad just now and leaving it at that. that has value too, doesn't it?

Re: 2/2

[ukan]

I was just about to write this whole conversation off and move on so yeah, I'd say it does.

[cactusy]

and i don't want you to write me off. you're too good a patrol partner for that.

[ukan]

You just like me for my nose.