cactusy | IC contact for lastvoyages

IC contact for lastvoyages

[If I don't have an active post up, feel free to use this post to have your character call, videochat, text, or knock on Shaw's door.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only | Expand All

It might help with more than Breaches. You have the… the thing where you question reality just… on a normal day sometimes, right? Not to the degree that you did with the sword curse, but often enough that you recognized it that day.

Are we talking questioning reality, or questioning my memories?

-- The answer to both is yes.

Journaling can help in either situation.

Every time I've tried, it's just felt like a waste of time. Especially the reality stuff. You ever tried to prove something that can't be proven? It's like...

[She pauses.]

Are you religious?

No. But I grew up around it.

[Oh good, that makes this a lot easier to explain.]

And so you were expected to take a lot of stuff on faith, right? To believe, and to be sure of that belief, even without proof. Even when there were things around you that seemed like evidence against what you were being told was true.

That’s what they expect. Yes.

Would journaling have convinced you?

It’s not about convincing yourself of anything. It’s about organizing your thoughts. It’s a way to look at them from outside.

... Isn't that what other people are for?

They can be. But sometimes a person just… needs a way to get their own perspective.

Yeah, well. I think the last thing I need is more of my own perspective on this one.

So. Basically being my twin last week; weird, or not weird?

It didn’t feel much different from normal. You just got mad at me less.

You know, I actually got mad at you about the same amount? Maybe you just took it in stride better, I dunno.

No. Maybe you were the same amount mad, but you didn’t shut the conversation down when you got mad, then.

I did when I didn't wanna talk about something, or just didn't want to talk at all. I don't remember how you reacted when I did-- details like that don't always stick around so easy.

But we were family. We grew up together; we were close. I knew I wasn't going to walk out on you for good, even when I was walking away from a conversation. You think you knew that, too?

Maybe. I know I didn't feel like I was... part of it as much as the others. I liked different things. I... liked my job.

Our job kidnapped Samantha when she was a kid and tortured her and her daemon in the name of science.

[A pause.]

Kidnapped Root, I mean.

It did? …Why were you so cryptic about it?

Because this was someone's life we were talking about, Malcolm. I couldn't trust you with the full story of what I'd found out if you were just gonna run to the big bosses about it. So I put out feelers. Neal proved he could be trusted; you and Doug failed spectacularly.

[She says this matter-of-factly, with no real vehemence or anger. It is what it is.]

Maybe we wouldn’t have if we knew lives were at stake. Real lives, not rumours.

I couldn't take that risk. I couldn't ask Samantha to take that risk.

That's fair. But that's also how people feel like they're... outside. Excluded from the circle. And that's... I mean, it's fine. I'm close to my sister at home, but I know lots of people aren't close to all their siblings. My mother doesn't talk to one of her sisters and the one that does talk to her only does so when she wants money.

But... there wasn't a circle to be excluded from, Bright. It was just something that I was doing, on my own. Even Neal wasn't involved.

Did you... ever talk to that girl that I liked?

(no subject)

cactusy - 2024-03-31 16:27 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

abrightboy - 2024-03-31 16:29 (UTC) - Expand

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only | Expand All