[She walks slowly but steadily through the wood, sticks and crusty snow and bones all crunching underfoot. She doesn't avoid any of them, nor does she dwell on why walking on the remains of dead things doesn't bother her. It feels fitting, after all: she's a dead thing too, or she will be soon. A ghost walking on ghosts.
And when she sees another walking ghost, one who's approaching from a different angle but heading in roughly the same direction, she just lifts a hand. Wiggles her fingers in a half-wave. Continues on.]
[There’s something familiar about the sound of it, walking over old bones, that tickles the back of her mind in a way that's hard to explain. It's a strange thought to be the first one you remember thinking. Nothing should be familiar when she doesn't know anything.
When she sees a flicker of movement a few feet ahead of her, she adjusts her angle to jog toward it.]
[She scoffs, somehow more irritated at this stranger’s hard-headedness than the disembodied voice asking questions that she doesn't think she can answer until she does.]
I always know where I want to be, even if I have to figure out how to get there on the way. We could be walking away from where we need to be!
[It could just be dark humor - her voice is dry and sardonic enough. But there's a note of seriousness to it too, a genuine question that she hadn't realized she was asking until the words were already out.]
Not me. [When you lost everything you knew and loved.] My father sent me away, and then he was… killed. Left to rot in the jungle for weeks. As soon as she knew he was gone for good, mum dumped me at the boarding school and that was that.
[That was absolutely not her experience. She can't conjure up any details - not now, not when she can't even conjure up her own name - but she knows that she had a stable, secure childhood.
Except--]
My father died, too. But not in a jungle, I don't think. No, he... he died in a car accident. I was there.
[Her mom had held her so tightly afterwards, squeezing her for what felt like hours.]
Okay, so your parents sucked. What about later, when you grew up?
[It's weird, like watching episodes from someone else’s life. She knows all these things are true, but can't remember her parents’ names, or the name of the school. Her father died because he cared too much, but she can't remember what about.]
Sorry. About your dad.
I don't remember how old I was now, but I ran away from the school eventually. Did shady jobs with shadier guys, and I couldn't count on any of them either. I learned that it's easier to rely on people if they want something from you.
People will support you for a while, sure, but there's always the next thing.
[ Konstantin's always been a pretty active presence in the town, but these days he truly can't be stopped. In the back of his mind he can't quite shake the thought that these "gifts" he's acquired are something to be wary of, and he is — he thinks they're the result of some kind of experimentation, and it strikes pretty damn close to what he was being turned into back home. A weapon.
....But he can't deny that it feels good to be strong again. To not be so limited by his "condition", by what's wrong with him. He still has his bad days, and the creature within his body still affects him, but with the Old Bear's Blessing and Free Runner coursing through his veins, he's feeling better than ever. He wants to keep moving, keep doing things, restless, bored if he stays put for too long.
Vasiliy's gone all day to make a trek for trade, and Konstantin finds himself heading into town to find someone for company... There's two pairs of ice skates slung over his shoulder — a larger pair for himself and then Vasya's smaller pair. He figures the other man won't mind if Konstantin lets someone borrow them. The itch to go skating out on the ice is too great to ignore, and he's hoping to rope a buddy in with him.
He tries the Community Center first, stepping up into the place with a bright grin as he looks around. When he spots Shaw, he's heading right over, lifting a hand in greeting, friendly as ever. ]
[Shaw is crouched on the floor in front of the fireplace, borrowing both its warmth and its light as she stitches a canvas patch onto a nylon winter coat. It's tough going, and she doesn't really have the supplies for it (as the two snapped sewing needles on the floor next to her feet can attest), but she's managing: she's nearly done, just a few more laborious stitches to go.]
You're smiling.
[She says, without looking up. She can hear it in his voice. Finishing off one stitch (and managing not to break the flimsy needle in the process), she lifts her gaze, squinting suspiciously.]
[ Konstantin laughs brightly at that, grin pulling wider. ]
This? This isn't so bad! No hailstorms or people trying to kill us, at least.
[ Sure, there was the weird, unsettling dream that he's pretty sure they all collectively had at the start of the new year. Whether the result of some drug, some shared hallucination brought about by their tormentors, or a true supernatural phenomenon, he still can't claim to fully know. What he does know is that he can't dwell on it. Keep moving.
He tilts his head curiously at what Shaw's working on, never shy to directly ask. He's nosy... ]
[And now he's smiling even wider. It's borderline-diabolical, honestly.]
Ripped my jacket.
[Shaw says, gesturing with her chin at the patchjob in her hands - one she's still working away at even as she chats, struggling to puncture the tough fabric with the little sewing needle.]
You know, back home I would have dumped this thing at the Salvation Army and bought myself a new one, but, uh-- I've been here for over a year, and this is the best piece of outerwear I've found.
[And speaking of clothing items - such as it is. Those skates dangling over his shoulder have not gone unnoticed.]
[ Konstantin peers closer to look at the clothing item — lifting his brows. ]
Ahhhh, I know what you mean. Hard to get new clothing around here... Next time I head out to Silverpoint, I'll keep an eye out for any jackets. Can't hurt to have a back-up. [ The coastal town has been less looted through than Milton, since most Interlopers don't live there. He's been able to find some good stuff in the little seaside cabins; there might be a few women's coats left here and there.
Straightening back up, Konstantin reaches up to pull free one of the pairs of skates, draping their tied-together strings over his hand. ]
On my way to some fun. [ His victim of choice has become clear.... Konstantin gives the skates a little wave with his hand, swinging them just a bit as he flashes another one of his most charming smiles at Shaw. Don't you want to come hang out with him? Of course you do! :) ] Have you ever been?
[Ohhhh, she sees where this is going, and she narrows her eyes hard at him. But, notably, she does not immediately rebuff him, nor does she simply stand up and walk away - both of which she could easily do. God knows that Sameen Shaw doesn't put up with things simply to be polite.]
When I was a kid.
[She says slowly.]
Indoor ice rinks, with big machines to keep the surface smooth. Always fifty yards from central heating. Because we weren't insane.
[ This time when Konstantin laughs, it's loud enough to carry, jovial and amused. ]
That's the safe route, not the fun one!
[ Is he mildly overconfident due to the 'feats' he has now? Maybe, but he also has always been like this. ]
I've done it plenty of times here. As long as you bundle up nice and warm, you'll be very comfortable. All that moving around gets the blood flowing anyway. Besides — what else is there for fun to do around here? No city shops or restaurants. I'm going crazy.
[The intended humor is in the implication; in the fact that that's not remotely true. But Shaw prefers her danger to come in the form of gun battles and high-speed car chases, not hypothermia risk. Her attention shifts away from him and towards the window, and she crosses her arms as a contemplative look settles across her face.]
I'm going crazy, too.
[She admits, and while she doubts that going ice skating would do a single thing to help that...
Nothing else she's been doing is helping, either. At least this will break up the monotony. With a sigh of defeat, she pushes herself to her feet, adding--]
If you get me killed in the dumbest possible way, I'm going to be pissed.
[ Konstantin definitely takes his risks where he can find them, in this place — braving the dangers of ice skating isn't exactly his flavour either, but he's maybe a little desperate. Keep the blood pumping, the adrenaline going, do something mildly dangerous... (It should be fine, right? Right??)
He beams, freshly bright and enthused as Shaw stands; Skating Friend acquired..... ]
No death will happen today! Not on my watch! [ Kostya, you can't guarantee that... ]
You know the Basin, right? That's the best spot. [ He smiles again as he gives her arm a little nudge with his elbow, brows lifting as though he's telling her something very exciting and important. ] I also brought snacks.
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singillatim
for Chloe
And when she sees another walking ghost, one who's approaching from a different angle but heading in roughly the same direction, she just lifts a hand. Wiggles her fingers in a half-wave. Continues on.]
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When she sees a flicker of movement a few feet ahead of her, she adjusts her angle to jog toward it.]
Hey! Do you know how we got here?
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No. Come on; we should keep walking.
[And she turns to go, motioning for the other woman to follow.]
Do you know who we are?
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[It's a bit disappointing to not have her memory jogged at all by this other woman, especially since presumably they'd arrived here at the same time.]
What's the rush? What's the difference between one direction and another at this point?
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"What kind of survivor are you?"
The answer she gives is an answer to both questions.]
I'm the kind of survivor who keeps walking. One direction's as good as any other right now, as long as I'm moving.
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I always know where I want to be, even if I have to figure out how to get there on the way. We could be walking away from where we need to be!
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[To drive her point home, she quickens her own pace. Crunch, crunch, crunch.]
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If we end up wandering into whatever killed all these people, I'm blaming you.
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[It could just be dark humor - her voice is dry and sardonic enough. But there's a note of seriousness to it too, a genuine question that she hadn't realized she was asking until the words were already out.]
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[Yes, it does. There's still so little that she remembers, but she does remember this.]
Other people die, but I don't. I am a survivor. I keep walking. But--
[She exhales, her breath visible in the air in front of her.]
Things aren't always what they seem.
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It's not magic. I keep myself alive. I've been on my own for a long time, and you can't count on anyone else to put you first.
[Surely this woman understands that if she's really such a rolling stone.
The voice comes again soon afterward: When you lost everything you knew and loved, how did you keep breathing?
What does that mean? She kicks a small skull.]
I was a kid. What else was I going to do?
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[She says this slowly, trying to drag a name out of the ether. After a beat:]
Parents do - or at least good ones. Partners sometimes do. Teammates.
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Except--]
My father died, too. But not in a jungle, I don't think. No, he... he died in a car accident. I was there.
[Her mom had held her so tightly afterwards, squeezing her for what felt like hours.]
Okay, so your parents sucked. What about later, when you grew up?
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Sorry. About your dad.
I don't remember how old I was now, but I ran away from the school eventually. Did shady jobs with shadier guys, and I couldn't count on any of them either. I learned that it's easier to rely on people if they want something from you.
People will support you for a while, sure, but there's always the next thing.
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early January
....But he can't deny that it feels good to be strong again. To not be so limited by his "condition", by what's wrong with him. He still has his bad days, and the creature within his body still affects him, but with the Old Bear's Blessing and Free Runner coursing through his veins, he's feeling better than ever. He wants to keep moving, keep doing things, restless, bored if he stays put for too long.
Vasiliy's gone all day to make a trek for trade, and Konstantin finds himself heading into town to find someone for company... There's two pairs of ice skates slung over his shoulder — a larger pair for himself and then Vasya's smaller pair. He figures the other man won't mind if Konstantin lets someone borrow them. The itch to go skating out on the ice is too great to ignore, and he's hoping to rope a buddy in with him.
He tries the Community Center first, stepping up into the place with a bright grin as he looks around. When he spots Shaw, he's heading right over, lifting a hand in greeting, friendly as ever. ]
Hello, hello! What are you up to today?
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You're smiling.
[She says, without looking up. She can hear it in his voice. Finishing off one stitch (and managing not to break the flimsy needle in the process), she lifts her gaze, squinting suspiciously.]
It's dark and it's freezing, and you're smiling.
[Honestly, Russians.]
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This? This isn't so bad! No hailstorms or people trying to kill us, at least.
[ Sure, there was the weird, unsettling dream that he's pretty sure they all collectively had at the start of the new year. Whether the result of some drug, some shared hallucination brought about by their tormentors, or a true supernatural phenomenon, he still can't claim to fully know. What he does know is that he can't dwell on it. Keep moving.
He tilts his head curiously at what Shaw's working on, never shy to directly ask. He's nosy... ]
What're you up to?
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Ripped my jacket.
[Shaw says, gesturing with her chin at the patchjob in her hands - one she's still working away at even as she chats, struggling to puncture the tough fabric with the little sewing needle.]
You know, back home I would have dumped this thing at the Salvation Army and bought myself a new one, but, uh-- I've been here for over a year, and this is the best piece of outerwear I've found.
[And speaking of clothing items - such as it is. Those skates dangling over his shoulder have not gone unnoticed.]
Are you... having fun?
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Ahhhh, I know what you mean. Hard to get new clothing around here... Next time I head out to Silverpoint, I'll keep an eye out for any jackets. Can't hurt to have a back-up. [ The coastal town has been less looted through than Milton, since most Interlopers don't live there. He's been able to find some good stuff in the little seaside cabins; there might be a few women's coats left here and there.
Straightening back up, Konstantin reaches up to pull free one of the pairs of skates, draping their tied-together strings over his hand. ]
On my way to some fun. [ His victim of choice has become clear.... Konstantin gives the skates a little wave with his hand, swinging them just a bit as he flashes another one of his most charming smiles at Shaw. Don't you want to come hang out with him? Of course you do! :) ] Have you ever been?
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When I was a kid.
[She says slowly.]
Indoor ice rinks, with big machines to keep the surface smooth. Always fifty yards from central heating. Because we weren't insane.
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That's the safe route, not the fun one!
[ Is he mildly overconfident due to the 'feats' he has now? Maybe, but he also has always been like this. ]
I've done it plenty of times here. As long as you bundle up nice and warm, you'll be very comfortable. All that moving around gets the blood flowing anyway. Besides — what else is there for fun to do around here? No city shops or restaurants. I'm going crazy.
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[The intended humor is in the implication; in the fact that that's not remotely true. But Shaw prefers her danger to come in the form of gun battles and high-speed car chases, not hypothermia risk. Her attention shifts away from him and towards the window, and she crosses her arms as a contemplative look settles across her face.]
I'm going crazy, too.
[She admits, and while she doubts that going ice skating would do a single thing to help that...
Nothing else she's been doing is helping, either. At least this will break up the monotony. With a sigh of defeat, she pushes herself to her feet, adding--]
If you get me killed in the dumbest possible way, I'm going to be pissed.
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He beams, freshly bright and enthused as Shaw stands; Skating Friend acquired..... ]
No death will happen today! Not on my watch! [ Kostya, you can't guarantee that... ]
You know the Basin, right? That's the best spot. [ He smiles again as he gives her arm a little nudge with his elbow, brows lifting as though he's telling her something very exciting and important. ] I also brought snacks.