IC contact for lastvoyages

[cactusy]

[If I don't have an active post up, feel free to use this post to have your character call, videochat, text, or knock on Shaw's door.]

Comments

[cactusy]

he suggested one person who wasn't even here at the time he suggested it.

[ukan]

Who was that?

[cactusy]

Caffrey. and i don't want to talk about why i vetoed him, but it's still a veto.

Look, Tennant. if he doesn't actually want to do this with Jedao and wants me to call it off, then i'll call it off. is that what he wants?

[ukan]

No. He wants to try with Jedao and he wants to figure things out with you.

But it's in everyone's best interests to be open to trying new approaches if this doesn't work.

[cactusy]

you know what's worse than not trying something, Lark?

[ukan]

Failure?

I'm joking. I'll try anything once, so...no. I don't know what's worse. Tell me.

[cactusy]

no. there are a lot of times when the risk of failure is worth it.

it's doing something that will definitely make things worse, and that's what i think advocates and spokespeople and speaking through proxies would do. i get that Malcolm feels more comfortable having people speak for him and interpret his words for other people. but Kiryu thought that it was important that he learn to speak for himself, even when it's hard. if we go back on that, we're undoing everything Kiryu was working towards.

[ukan]

So what are you going to do if he can't work with Jedao?

[cactusy]

i don't know. try to find somebody else. but if he doesn't want to do it while speaking for himself, then that's a no-go for me. if this is going to work, neither of us should use crutches. and that includes people whose primary goal is arguing for the interests of one or the other of us, instead of listening to us talk and calling us out on unhelpful behavioral patterns.

[ukan]

So couples' counseling?

[cactusy]

did you miss the memo that that's basically exactly what this is?

[ukan]

Yeah pretty much.

I wish Jean was around for you two. She's who my husband and I saw for therapy.

[cactusy]

don't suppose she was an actual therapist?

[ukan]

Yeah, PhD and everything. She was also telepathic. There were no miscommunications with her.

[cactusy]

telepathy, huh.

[Shaw isn't quite sure what she thinks about that, but quickly decides that since Jean isn't here and therefore isn't an option, it's not worth puzzling out.]

listen. off the record.

[She doesn't believe for a moment that this won't all get reported back to Malcolm regardless of what she says, but by god she can try.]

i know you're trying to help your friend. or packmate. or whatever. and i know how Malcolm thinks. i'm guessing he's assuming i picked Jedao because we're secretly best friends and we've worked out a deal for him to go easy on me.

but one of the top reasons i picked him is that i've talked through stuff with him before, and he doesn't go easy on me. i once asked him for advice on what i should do about Malcolm getting in the way of me working with Will. he told me i should let it go and get over it. i still don't totally agree, but he laid out his perspective, and it kind of made sense. he could have just given me vague sympathetic platitudes and kept his real thoughts to himself, but he didn't. i don't think he'll let Malcolm get away with things he'd rather be allowed to get away with, but i don't think he'll let me get away with anything, either. and that's what i want out of this.

[ukan]

Actually Malcolm thinks Jedao will try to be fair. He didn't mention anything about Jedao even knowing you before all this. His concern is that Jedao misinterprets a lot of what Malcolm says and does, and that's a valid concern to have about a mediator.

[cactusy]

it's a valid concern to have about an advocate. but if someone who's helping you learn to express yourself better misinterprets you, it gives you a concrete example of what you need to work on. Kiryu misunderstood both of us sometimes. we worked through it. that's what this whole thing is about, Lark.

[ukan]

It can, and often does, lead to taking sides, Shaw.

[cactusy]

it didn't with him. he was fair. i think Jedao will be too, and it sounds like Malcolm agrees.

[ukan]

I hope so.

[cactusy]

like i said. i get that you want to help your friend. and this is the friendship redemption Barge where everyone thinks everyone can be solved with friendship, all the time.

but sometimes, we need something else.

[ukan]

You really don't get that I want to help you too, do you?

[cactusy]

i think you'd consider that a nice bonus, but i know i'm not your priority. and i don't need to be.

[ukan]

Will Graham is my priority. That means making sure you're looked after, too.

[cactusy]

fair enough

which means i understand your reasons but this is still a really bad idea